jhintonh
12-08-2004, 08:21 PM
Good Evening-
I present you with a question, but first I offer some examples:
Scenario #1: You are in the mall waiting for your significant other to decide on either the Dooney "It Bag" or the new Coach canvas & leather purse (male version)/decide between the latest Samsung DLP or Mitsubishi LCD Projection TV (female perspective). So you plop down on a nearby fake bed (male) / sit down in the fake theater seat (female) and retrieve your Palm powered handheld. A fellow "sufferer" sits down close by and observes your ability to entertain yourself via your electronic "pal". They become interested and strike up a conversation. Soon you are singing the praises of your "Lil Buddy" and they say, "I am going to get me one of those."
Scenario #2: You are in a meeting at work and you are busy taking notes/scheduling a future meeting/looking up contact information and someone sitting next to you says, "Hey is that a Palm Pilot?", revealing at once their lack of focus on the handheld computer market since 1991 and an obscure column in the Wall Street Journal and their total lack of interest in the meeting itself. You say, yes it is a pocket sized computing device and go on to speak of your business e-companion and its capabilities and after a few minutes the other person says, "I am going to get me one of those."
Scenario #3: You are standing in line at the college book store and you calculate your time-to-the-register to be approximately ten minutes. Plenty of time, you reason, for a quarter-mission in Warfare, Inc. or several levels of Bejeweled. Out comes the Palm powered plaything and the bloke/chick standing behind/in front of you hears or sees you arranging your jewels (if you are male, I hope this is an action involving your stylus, not your right hand). They inquire as to your "game" and you tell them all about the multitudes of time-wasting games available for your device, throwing in the fact that, "it can hold phone numbers and addresses too" just for good measure and to somehow seem a bit more "adult". They ask if they can try it out, you oblige begrudgingly and mentally cringe as they "TAP" like an angry lumberjack on your screen. You quickly say, "Hey look the line's moving," so that they will return your Palm and then they say, with eyes still glued to the 3"x5" electronic past-time wonder, "I am going to get me one of those."
Scenario #4: You are standing at the PDA counter (wherever they still exist) at a local electronics/computer store. You are looking at all of the new Palm models, even the one that you have tucked away in your pocket at that very moment, just because it is somehow cool to see on display what you already own, and some obvious "unwashed" (translated: as yet non-Palmed) approaches the counter. They begin "playing" (how could they know yet how to "work" a Palm, after all) with the various devices. They may even stray towards the "enemy" side of the counter (different ends depending on whether you are a Palmer or a PPChead). So you pull out your own personal device and begin using it, standing at least 18 inches from any of the display models so that the newbie can see that THAT device is obviously your own, not a display. Soon the unconverted looks to you for advice, as you are a current user and therefore by default an "expert". You feel that warm rush of blood that is as near to adrenaline as you can get standing in CompUSA and you proceed to laud the Palm and its many "useful" and "indispensable" attributes. Saying things like, "I don't know how anyone gets by without one of these," or "I'd be lost without mine now" and "best damn thing I ever bought". You tap, press, slide, flip, flip & rotate and jog-dial with uncanny aplomb, all the while exhibiting "Your Precious" in as favorable a light as you can. With shiny eyes and hands reaching for the diplay unit of your model, the "amazed" customer says, "I am going to get me one of those."
Scenario #5: You are a single elegible male/female at a great party (definitions here vary widely, and not just based on gender) and this drop-dead gorgeous girl/woman/lady or boy/guy/man with beautiful eyes (notice that it matters not your sex or body type to possess this most important attraction) approaches and asks, "What's in a Raunchy Sex on The Beach So Hot It Gets Sand In Your Blank adult mixed beverage?" You calmly pull out your Palm powered opposite-sex-awing Dynamo and look it up in your drink recipe program. The person asking is swept away by your knowledge/handiness/resourcefulness/mastery of small electronic devices and assails you with a passionate kiss that tells you that you and he/she are soul mates (or something of value to one another). You leave the party immediately, blood pressure rising, asking yourself who the hell needs Viagra, and two people standing nearby who witnessed the whole scene say simultaneously as they watch you two jet the scene, "I am going to get me one of those!"
Now I ask you, O faithful Brothers and Sisters of the Knights of the Transflective Display...Beautiful Salespersons of the Backlighted Bonanza...Evangelizers and Wavers of the Palm (and its Branches)...Portable Computing Believers...........WHERE'S OUR COMMISSION?!
Have you experienced any of those Scenarios? What are your stories of converting newbies into Card Carrying Members of the Palm-Powered Community?
Do share.
-Jhintonh
I present you with a question, but first I offer some examples:
Scenario #1: You are in the mall waiting for your significant other to decide on either the Dooney "It Bag" or the new Coach canvas & leather purse (male version)/decide between the latest Samsung DLP or Mitsubishi LCD Projection TV (female perspective). So you plop down on a nearby fake bed (male) / sit down in the fake theater seat (female) and retrieve your Palm powered handheld. A fellow "sufferer" sits down close by and observes your ability to entertain yourself via your electronic "pal". They become interested and strike up a conversation. Soon you are singing the praises of your "Lil Buddy" and they say, "I am going to get me one of those."
Scenario #2: You are in a meeting at work and you are busy taking notes/scheduling a future meeting/looking up contact information and someone sitting next to you says, "Hey is that a Palm Pilot?", revealing at once their lack of focus on the handheld computer market since 1991 and an obscure column in the Wall Street Journal and their total lack of interest in the meeting itself. You say, yes it is a pocket sized computing device and go on to speak of your business e-companion and its capabilities and after a few minutes the other person says, "I am going to get me one of those."
Scenario #3: You are standing in line at the college book store and you calculate your time-to-the-register to be approximately ten minutes. Plenty of time, you reason, for a quarter-mission in Warfare, Inc. or several levels of Bejeweled. Out comes the Palm powered plaything and the bloke/chick standing behind/in front of you hears or sees you arranging your jewels (if you are male, I hope this is an action involving your stylus, not your right hand). They inquire as to your "game" and you tell them all about the multitudes of time-wasting games available for your device, throwing in the fact that, "it can hold phone numbers and addresses too" just for good measure and to somehow seem a bit more "adult". They ask if they can try it out, you oblige begrudgingly and mentally cringe as they "TAP" like an angry lumberjack on your screen. You quickly say, "Hey look the line's moving," so that they will return your Palm and then they say, with eyes still glued to the 3"x5" electronic past-time wonder, "I am going to get me one of those."
Scenario #4: You are standing at the PDA counter (wherever they still exist) at a local electronics/computer store. You are looking at all of the new Palm models, even the one that you have tucked away in your pocket at that very moment, just because it is somehow cool to see on display what you already own, and some obvious "unwashed" (translated: as yet non-Palmed) approaches the counter. They begin "playing" (how could they know yet how to "work" a Palm, after all) with the various devices. They may even stray towards the "enemy" side of the counter (different ends depending on whether you are a Palmer or a PPChead). So you pull out your own personal device and begin using it, standing at least 18 inches from any of the display models so that the newbie can see that THAT device is obviously your own, not a display. Soon the unconverted looks to you for advice, as you are a current user and therefore by default an "expert". You feel that warm rush of blood that is as near to adrenaline as you can get standing in CompUSA and you proceed to laud the Palm and its many "useful" and "indispensable" attributes. Saying things like, "I don't know how anyone gets by without one of these," or "I'd be lost without mine now" and "best damn thing I ever bought". You tap, press, slide, flip, flip & rotate and jog-dial with uncanny aplomb, all the while exhibiting "Your Precious" in as favorable a light as you can. With shiny eyes and hands reaching for the diplay unit of your model, the "amazed" customer says, "I am going to get me one of those."
Scenario #5: You are a single elegible male/female at a great party (definitions here vary widely, and not just based on gender) and this drop-dead gorgeous girl/woman/lady or boy/guy/man with beautiful eyes (notice that it matters not your sex or body type to possess this most important attraction) approaches and asks, "What's in a Raunchy Sex on The Beach So Hot It Gets Sand In Your Blank adult mixed beverage?" You calmly pull out your Palm powered opposite-sex-awing Dynamo and look it up in your drink recipe program. The person asking is swept away by your knowledge/handiness/resourcefulness/mastery of small electronic devices and assails you with a passionate kiss that tells you that you and he/she are soul mates (or something of value to one another). You leave the party immediately, blood pressure rising, asking yourself who the hell needs Viagra, and two people standing nearby who witnessed the whole scene say simultaneously as they watch you two jet the scene, "I am going to get me one of those!"
Now I ask you, O faithful Brothers and Sisters of the Knights of the Transflective Display...Beautiful Salespersons of the Backlighted Bonanza...Evangelizers and Wavers of the Palm (and its Branches)...Portable Computing Believers...........WHERE'S OUR COMMISSION?!
Have you experienced any of those Scenarios? What are your stories of converting newbies into Card Carrying Members of the Palm-Powered Community?
Do share.
-Jhintonh